Lo-chan07

Growing tired of seeing posts about being revived from the dead in this journal lol. I really want to get better at uploading stuff, but I barely feel satisfied with my art and DA feels kinda outdated nowadays... But it's kind of the only portfolio I have that contains what I create, both new and old stuff. And since I'm not very popular either I get stuck with the thoughts of "whatever, no one cares anyway. No one is interesting in seeing what I create unless I'm a pro". So yeah.

Buuuuuuuuuuuutttttttttt~ I'm actually going to study this season. I got accepted into a school with a comic-program, more specialized in manga! Nosebleedstudio, the most famous manga-studio in Sweden is holding it and I'm super excited to learn how they distribute their artworks! I'm still struggling with a lot of pain, but I've recently bought a Wacom MobileStudio Pro (13", felt like it was enough for me and it really is) so I'll be able to draw when I'm bedbound <3 I've noticed that I feel more pain in my arms and hands by drawing traditionally than digitally and I do wish to get better at digital art, so I'm excited!
Maybe I'll finally get to the point of releasing my own comics <3<3<3

Lol, just a little more than a year since the last time I wrote...
Life is getting brighter so maybe I can start using this account a little bit more and actually make some art. I'm so sick of my username tho... but I don't want to pay for it xD So I'll have to wait with that decision.

But yeah... I'm alive! Imma looking forward to submit stuff over here <3

Gotten myself addicted to Pokémon-games.

I've never had the chance to own a beauty like old school-gameboy, so I've been kinda unsure about buying Pokémon-games later on. I've gotten myself a Nintendo New 3ds when it was new (traded my "old" 3ds to get a cheaper prize on the new one) and thought about saving money for it, but it always went to other games that I KNEW for certain that I would like. Now that I got the chance to borrow Pokémon Omega Ruby and try it out from a friend, I'm completely obsessed of it. I love the adventure-type games so it shouldn't be much of a surprise (and I'm also gen.1 old school when it comes to the whole interest in Pokémon) but this completely took me away. I've spent so much time in tears, frustration and (almost) blood to achieve my own goals in it and has been researching a lot to understand the possabilities more. I'm even breeding my own superpokémon now haha.

I've been world-trading alot but haven't even faced the champions league yet hahaha. I'm such a coward, but I'm planning on heading right to it first thing in the morning tomorrow. I've been walking too much on the victory road lol, just to level up and train my pokémon.

Now that I'm totally sold on pokémon-games I'm gonna save up money for Sapphire, X, Y and everything else too! And of course, the upcoming Sun and Moon

Wow, getting dusty here haha.
You know what? I've reached exactly 10,933 notifications here on deviantart. I mean, damn, I've been inactive multiple times before, but I think these numbers hit the record for me haha.

~¨~¨~ *** ~¨~¨~

Before I get into the deep stuff I would like to inform you that I'm slowly turning into being vegan and that I'm constantly looking for products that isn't used of or on animals, like makeup products or maybe other beauty products! Please let me know if you have some awesome products that you like to use and that is on a reasonable budget

~¨~¨~ *** ~¨~¨~

I really want to actively upload art and have deviantart as a portfolio... but I'm really slow at finding time to treasure myself spending time on art. I WANT to evolve and become a great, creative artist... but adulthood have made it too difficult for me. There is no one that believes in a successful way in art, at least not making a living on it and that triggers my anxiety towards my art. I feel worthless and that I'm wasting my time, even if I KNOW that art is something that I used to enjoy.

Well, I also suffer of mental illness that leads to so many physical illnesses, so it's hard to even find energy to do something fun. It's like an evil circle. I can't create art because of lack of health and money (also lack of believing in it), I can't get healthier because money is a struggle. Too many bills and no money because no one wants to hire someone who doesn't feel well most of the time. Many visits to hospital and psychiatrists (did I spell that right?) and many suggests that I focus on doing things that makes me happy.... BUT I have to manage to have time to: exercise or maybe go out for a walk, do normal house chores (that is way heavier and more struggling to do compared to a healthy person), remember that I get to eat well, always pay these fucking bills and continue with school work.... that's been left because I was too sick to do them before.

So yeah, thing's pretty rough right now. It's hard to explain so you understand. I just hope that I find my motivation to get creative again and really embrace it this time. I want to find a passion, something that drives me forward. Something that makes me realise that life is worth living, instead of ending it. (Sorry, got a little dark there but hey, that's my ugly flaw that's been embracing me for some years)

Wow, getting dusty here haha. You know what? I've reached exactly 10,933 notifications here on deviantart. I mean, damn, I've been inactive multiple times before, but I think these numbers hit the record for me haha.

~¨~¨~ *** ~¨~¨~

Before I get into the deep stuff I would like to inform you that I'm slowly turning into being vegan and that I'm constantly looking for products that isn't used of or on animals, like makeup products or maybe other beauty products! Please let me know if you have some awesome products that you like to use and that is on a reasonable budget

~¨~¨~ *** ~¨~¨~

I really want to actively upload art and have deviantart as a portfolio... but I'm really slow at finding time to treasure myself spending time on art. I WANT to evolve and become a great, creative artist... but adulthood have made it too difficult for me. There is no one that believes in a successful way in art, at least not making a living on it and that triggers my anxiety towards my art. I feel worthless and that I'm wasting my time, even if I KNOW that art is something that I used to enjoy.

Well, I also suffer of mental illness that leads to so many physical illnesses, so it's hard to even find energy to do something fun. It's like an evil circle. I can't create art because of lack of health and money (also lack of believing in it), I can't get healthier because money is a struggle. Too many bills and no money because no one wants to hire someone who doesn't feel well most of the time. Many visits to hospital and psychiatrists (did I spell that right?) and many suggests that I focus on doing things that makes me happy.... BUT I have to manage to have time to: exercise or maybe go out for a walk, do normal house chores (that is way heavier and more struggling to do compared to a healthy person), remember that I get to eat well, always pay these fucking bills and continue with school work.... that's been left because I was too sick to do them before.

So yeah, thing's pretty rough right now. It's hard to explain so you understand. I just hope that I find my motivation to get creative again and really embrace it this time. I want to find a passion, something that drives me forward. Something that makes me realise that life is worth living, instead of ending it. (Sorry, got a little dark there but hey, that's my ugly flaw that's been embracing me for some years)